‘Dreams Deferred’ Stories – Sonja


‘When it all comes down”

‘When it all comes down’

One writer interpreted Hughes’ “sags like a heavy load” as an attempt for Hughes to point out just how important dreams are. They are so important that they are heavy and the going will be tough to achieve them and may also weigh heavy on our minds. Others can be there for you but in the end, they can’t share this load or help you carry it.

For a lifetime, Sonja has carried the need and the dream to feel safe and secure backed by the continued obstacles that she’s steadily endured. It’s always been a fear of not having anywhere or anyone to fall back on,” attributes Sonja. As most things, there is hardly one traceable root but Sonja largely connects her deferred dream to what seems to be when every time in her life, she’s started to allow herself to feel safe, the other shoe has always dropped. This feeling meets her early losing her sister to domestic violence and then her foster father and to years later after she and her biological mother reconnected, losing her mom in 2015 to a heart attack.

In spite of it all, Sonja is hopeful. When she thinks of what her future and the weight of this load may look like on it, she reflects back to how her mom after many years being lost found her way back to her and the rest of their family. “So sometimes the very thing that you see yourself struggling with will actually work itself out. I see purpose in everything that has happened and I accept my challenges with security. I still will have to continue to carry it but eventually just like in my mom case, there’s going to be a time where I can set that load down.”

Sonja, interviewed on November 2, 2016

‘Quintessential – the pure essence of…’

It’s a rare moment to not find Sonja bursting over in exuberance and warmness. This image captures Sonja’s dynamic spirit and infectious laughter shared with everyone who knows her. She’s the person that knows everyone and everyone loves to know her— the quintessential extrovert and safe haven for others dedicating her life and time to her passion of service— from mentoring young women in the Judah Tribe at church to mentoring foster children. With all the layers that each of us puts on and wears, it is still hard to imagine any story deeper than the one we see of Sonja at face value— even for those that know her story.

When asked about what her journey has taught her, Sonja immediately recounts, “My number one lesson is that your past doesn’t determine your future. My past became less and less important and what became more important was what I wanted or how I saw myself.”

We all have the capacity to write the middle and end of our stories and Sonja is doing just that. “I’ve always felt that my purpose was to be a voice or to help lead people. Now, maybe I’m still figuring it out in what ways to lead them but I’m certain that my ability to be very personal is a part of it.”

Sonja, interviewed on November 2, 2016

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